Greedy Capitalist Pig wrote:The fact that there are already so many versions is a testament to the fact that too much of it has been politicized over the course of history. The King James version is no exception.
Quote:
1:1 In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
1:2 And the earth was without form, and void. And by "without form, and void" I mean a spherical molten mass; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters, but only after the earth cooled enough for water vapour to condense and form the waters
1:3 And God said, "Oh @!#$, I forgot to make the Sun" So he went back in time before he made the Earth, and made the Sun. And God said Let there be light: and there was light.
1:4 And God saw the light, that it was good: and God divided the light from the darkness. Which was rather redundant, given that a spherical Earth already had the light and darkness divided. But God is obsessive compulsive.
1:5 And God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night. And noted to himself to ensure that in 4.5 billion years, some of the inhabitants of the Earth would give it the same designation. And the evening and the morning (aka the past billion years or so, including the bit where he had to jump back in time) were the first day.
1:6 And God said, Let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters, and let it divide the waters from the waters. And then he said, that's just metaphorical.
1:7 And then God continued to speak metaphorically, with all the division of firmaments and what not.
1:8 And God called the firmament Heaven. And that was the end of that day. Which means he didn't do a goddamned thing all day.
1:9 And God said, Let the waters under the heaven be gathered together unto one place, and let the dry land appear. And then he said, "Oh, @!#$ that's right... I already did that. Well that was easy."
1:10 And God called the dry land Earth; and the gathering together of the waters called he Seas. And then he changed his mind and decided to call it the ocean: and God saw that it was good.
1:11 And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass. Then he traveled forward in time and said let the earth bring the herb yielding seed. Finally, he went further ahead in time to make the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed is in itself, upon the earth: and it was so.
1:12 And the earth brought forth grass, and herb yielding seed after his kind, and the tree yielding fruit, whose seed was in itself, after his kind: and God saw that it was good.
1:13 And the evening and the morning were the third day
ThatGuy85 wrote:Eating meat on sunday used to be a hell-worthy offense, but you don't see that kinda crap anymore do you?
ThatGuy85 wrote:To quote dogma: You people don't celebrate your religion, you mourn it.
Weebel wrote:I liked that movie.... thought it was funny.....
And how many man changed versions of something that god supposedly said do you need before you consider the bible BS in general?
Personally.... I dont care about this.... I dont believe in the bible at all... so for me... its just another version of the same book of lies for more simple minded people to believe..
I'm not taking jabs at anyone in particular.... thats just how I feel about it.
shiZblam wrote:Weebel wrote:I liked that movie.... thought it was funny.....
And how many man changed versions of something that god supposedly said do you need before you consider the bible BS in general?
Personally.... I dont care about this.... I dont believe in the bible at all... so for me... its just another version of the same book of lies for more simple minded people to believe..
I'm not taking jabs at anyone in particular.... thats just how I feel about it.
This could be the first thing you've ever said on this site that I agree with.